I had intended to write this entry about my cleansing on a day to day basis. I have been on what is called The Master Cleanse for 6 days now, and it has been a very surprising journey so far. I am amazed at how determined I've stayed ...as every time I have tried to do something like this in the past I completely freak out about 5 hours into it! It has been a good way of proving to myself that I do have the ability to make changes. And stick to them. I have 4 more days to go on this journey, and look forward to the results I will see.
I started this process because I get sick with everything. I came near to dying a few years ago when I had a blood clot take a trip around my system...followed by 12 of its' friends who camped out in my leg. I catch every cold that comes through. And, of course, I want to lose weight (and look awesome in my dress for the Country Music Awards in 3 weeks...)
Yet, I have had a much deeper cleansing than I thought I would.
In the last 24 hours, something has happened to me. I literally feel like I'm purging every MAN I've had a relationship with out of my system. I feel like my mind is clearer, and for some reason, has taken me down memory lane. It is as though my body is telling me to let go of OTHER things I've been holding on to ...not just old food and physical toxins. Emotional toxins too.
Last night I verbal vomited all over my diary, cried and reminisced. I recognized what I've learned from every guy I've had feelings for, or been cheated on, or dumped by, or dumped them. I've made some poor choices, but they have led me to this place where I have been given the opportunity to clean them out. Literally. I have detoxed my love life. I woke up this morning a bit melancholy, but after moving around a bit I actually feel great. I feel like I just lost 2000 pounds of baggage. 2000 pounds of men and all the shit from them I have carried with me for so long. 2000 pounds that I can thank for teaching me lessons.
It's honestly like I flushed them all down the toilet.
Friday, March 13, 2009
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